I believe that our dreams for our children never stop, but do change as our children grow to become who they are in life.  I believe that we all want more for our children than we had in life.  We wish for lifelong happiness for our children.  The hard part is to know what happiness for them looks like, versus what happiness to us looks like.  The one dream I have is that all children could enjoy a happy, fulfilled life.

When I was pregnant, I began thinking of ‘the perfect family’ dreams that would include a daughter.  Those dreams included that she would be beautiful, more talented, better educated, have a better job, and of course, be more independent than me.  I dreamed of a child who was kind-hearted and a Christian who would someday be a wife and mother herself.  I dreamed of generations of women in our family doing family holidays in the kitchen, shopping and enjoying generations of new babies.

Jennifer was beautiful inside and out, so my dreams grew toward hoping she would attend college and have a career that would guarantee her financial independence. I began to dream that it would be important for her to have talents that would be used in life skills, so that she could be independent.  Once again, dreams came true.  Her independence and athletic abilities surprised all of us.  She was now beautiful, a good athlete, wonderful with children she baby-sat and at the daycare, as well as independent. 

Along with those attributes, she was a Christian who insisted on including her friends in church activities—especially Sunday School.  I realized that my dreams for her had begun to come true.  The only dream left was that she go to college, and enjoy a family life and career.

Then in one moment we lost her, and then I only dreamed of how wonderful it would be to just have her here with me.  You see, all those visions we have for our daughters are not as important as just having the opportunity to hug them one more time.  So my dream now is just to see her again and that will happen someday—when we meet in Heaven.

For daughters everywhere in all walks of life, I wish for you profound happiness. Only you can know what that looks like for you.  Happiness comes in different packages; for some it’s wrapped with families, friends and children while for others it’s wrapped in careers.  Find your own personal happiness and enjoy it—this is my dream for you.

Many thanks to Pam for allowing WomenBloom to reprint her lovely essay.  It was originally published in Dreams for Our Daughters, a collection of dreams and wishes for our collective daughers.  Bonnie Coffey authored the book in October 2000 because she believes 'girls need dreams to thrive'.  To learn more about Bonnie and about the book, go to www.dreamsforourdaughters.com .

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